February 2012
2 posts
January 2012
7 posts
Me: “Did you know you’re too small for me to cut you open and crawl inside you...
– Twitter / @sween
Words with Blowing Up Balloons
Me: These taste like condoms.
Julie: ...
Me: ...
Julie: ...
Me: ...
Julie: ...
Me: ...
Julie: ...
Me: ...probably.
December 2011
11 posts
Words with Coworkers
Her: Can you fix my printer?
Me: What is it doing?
Her: It's not printing.
Me: I didn't ask what it's not doing.
Her: It's...
Me: Use your words.
Her: Uhm...
Me: ...
Her: It's...
Me: ...
Her: ...
Me: Please. Continue.
Her: It is doing nothing?
Me: That's exactly what I'm going to go do in my office.
Her: UGH JUST FIX MY PRINTER.
Me: I'll take a look at it when I care. Full disclosure... that day may never come.
Her: Why do you hate me?
Me: I don't. I hate that printer. It used to be my printer, and it never worked. So I put it over here before you got hired. And it still calls me and wants to get back together. But it's broken. And I'm not the one to fix it.
Her: You're so mean.
Me: That printer started it.
Her: If you fix it, I'll bring a cake tomorrow.
Me: Put it in writing. And print it out. Oh wait.
Her: You're so mean.
November 2011
13 posts
Scheißegal, was für ein cooler, harter Knochen du bist: Reicht dir ein...
– Twitter / @unterschlicht
Excuse me. How can I get to Kuhfistenstrasse?” Der Engländer in Berlin....
– Twitter / @onrie
This is so cool!!!” - how to ruin a threesome
– Twitter / @kellyoxford
October 2011
9 posts
September 2011
6 posts
3 tags
Das war einfach viel zu lange gar nix und jetzt viel zu viel auf einmal”, lacht...
– De:Bug Magazin » Studiobesuch: Mouse on Mars
August 2011
8 posts